Monday, August 31, 2015

Why do we listen to Celebrities?

I recently posted a Facebook post before stopping to think about it. I blame all the meds I'm taking for my asthma and hay fever...

Seriously though I had a go at Jamie Oliver after reading a click bait headline saying he was declaring a war on sugar. Now what got me incensed was that I am sick and tired of seeing him everywhere. He has sold out in my opinion. He will put his face on anything including products containing sugar.

A few of my friends disagreed with my rant because they thought I was against the actual message. I realise that in my angry haste I worded my point badly and was misunderstood ( a lesson for us all! - write post, re-read post, think - then delete as appropriate!) I'm not against the actual message. Whilst I hate it when people declare war on anything let alone one particular type of food I of course believe we all should learn about sugar and what it does. We should aim for a balanced diet and learn about hidden sugars in processed food etc.

But the more I think about it the more it bothers me that people who become famous because they are talented at something think that qualifies them to tell people how to live their lives.




What we eat, what we buy, what we even think about certain things all seems to be heavily linked with the celebrity obsession our society has. Companies spend millions of dollars on celebrity endorsements because people are more likely to buy something that is endorsed by a celebrity.

Why though? You pay an actress to be in an ad for hair dye or make up. Do you really think she uses that product? She dyes her hair at home? Chances are she isn't using cover girl make-up either. So why do we think these products are automatically better? 

The same goes for the celebrity chef. Curtis Stone doesn't use those pans his name is on you can buy at Target. Putting his name and face on it just means you are being suckered into paying more for a pan that is identical to the one next to it because it has his face and name on it.

There is of course a very strong psychological force here. People are led to believe if they buy and use the products then that some way brings a tiny bit of celebrity into their lives. 

Though that in itself is worrying. Why do we give these people so much kudos? Why should I be happy that my son will hear it from Jamie Oliver that he should limit sugar? Because if I teach him to listen to a celebrity about that then I'm teaching him a celebrity knows best.

Why don't we listen to scientists, nutritionists and read up on topics for ourselves rather than take on board what a celebrity says?  How do we know when a celebrity genuinely believes something and when they are being paid to sell us things? 

So basically I am fed up with celebrity culture. I don't get it. I don't understand it. I don't see why I should pick a product off the shelf because of a photo shopped picture of a celebrity trying to tell me how good it is. It's getting harder to find products that are not endorsed by someone famous though. This is how bad things have gotten.

So yes I will teach my son about the dangers of too much sugar but not because Jamie Oliver wants his face in the paper again. I will teach him that because of facts.

It is time we all remembered that celebrities are people. I am all for admiring someone for their talent. But when it's come to a point that celebrities are the go to for our life choices then I think we have taken it too far. 

Sunday, August 2, 2015

Your Vagina is ok, mine is ok, it's all ok!

The rise of the Internet has meant we have access to so much more information than we used to. If you have an opinion, an issue, a question or a problem the answer might simply be available after typing in a sentence. There are forums and Facebook pages dedicated to many things including being or becoming a parent.

It's posts from those type of sites I want to talk about today. I have seen quite a few times women asking in all seriousness about how other women overcome any embarrassment about their bodies when they are due to give birth. It seems hang ups about our bodies go so far that it interferes even with the wonder of the miracle of life. Women are scared of people seeing them 'down there' as they wonder if they look different or somehow 'abnormal' Will nurses stare or laugh behind their hands?

I don't mean to make light as in our society nakedness really still does have a huge stigma. Women do worry about what they look like naked, especially those parts not normally on display, even in a revealing swimsuit. Now before the Internet I honestly didn't even know some women worried about the size of their labia. But they do. They wonder whether parts are too dark or too big or too small.

It seems before you could be an anonymous person at a computer keyboard most women wouldn't  ask anyone these questions for fear of embarrassment. Well I'm not here to try to get you to love your body as it is ( though I think that is important) but rather to tell you that there is no normal. No matter what you look like between your legs the doctors, nurses etc have seen it all and truly will not give a shit what you look like down there.

Not convinced? Well I feel somewhat knowledgable enough to tell you a few things. Long ago I totally lost any self consciousness about my body when it comes to medial professionals. I have had a few procedures, been in the emergency room a few times and seen many different types of doctors for various things. I have a chronic illness which has manifested differently over the years so there have been many visits to medical practitioners.

Now I can't remember the first time I was completely happy to strip off and not even think about it. Though  I remember some reactions once I was. Some doctors are obviously used to women being nervous so they gently ask me if I could pull up or down a sleeve when what they really need is for me to take my top off. So I simply offer to do so. Most look relieved, others looked a bit shocked.... Obviously I'm one of a kind there. 

If a doctor wants to see my chest then that's fine, he has seen plenty of others. He doesn't give a shit what my boobs look like. I've had numerous Pap smears. I tend to just chat during them now. Once a male doctor asked if I would rather a female doctor to do it. It really didn't bother me. I almost asked him how many vagina's he had seen. I didn't but I imagine the number would be in the 100's.

Those hospital gowns which are open at the back. They are like that for easy access. A doctor has to examine my tummy then he gets to see my undies. All I hope is that my undies are pretty. I care little that he might catch a glimpse of inner thigh or outer thigh. At the osteopath they give you those gowns then you lie face down and when they need to work on your lower back they pull your undies down anyway. So I truly don't see why I don't just take them off. While the Osteo prods my naked buttocks I'm happy to talk about the weather or ask about the music playing. Again I  imagine my buttocks are not the worst things they have ever seen. 

I once had a procedure done under anaesthetic and when I woke up I was fully clothed. So either I was so out of it I didn't remember getting myself dressed, and given I was still shaky on my feet at this point I doubt it. Or else someone dressed me while I was unconscious. For a brief moment I pondered what that must have been like for the person involved then I mentally shrugged and picked up the magazine beside the bed and had a read.  

But of course none of this relates to childbirth but I've left that story for last since it is the best. Once you have been pregnant and had a child any sense of modesty pretty much goes out the window. Truly...no matter how self conscious you were beforehand. 

I remember how quickly any small bit of modesty I may have had completely evaporated from the moment I went to the hospital to have my son induced. A few different midwives got to poke around my nether regions and insert things. One got me in the shower when the horrendous contractions started. Even after I had the hospital gown on and was on the bed hooked up to the monitor and mostly keeping my legs together things didn't stay that way for long.

So I was waiting for an epidural... Because you know... Horrendous pain. Then suddenly this Greek God appears in the room. One of the most handsome looking men I had ever seen in my life had come to rescue me to carry me off in his chariot away from this hell I was in. Well at least that's what I thought in my strange pain daze. I did wonder if I was hallucinating. Why is this Man here? Then he is introduced as the anaesthetist. So good news... Pain will soon go away, of course the fact that this amazing specimen was here to simply insert a large needle into my spine was not really akin to being whisked off in a chariot... But oh well.

So after he had done the business so to speak he stayed for a while to do the paperwork. The room I was in was set up in an interesting way. About two metres from the foot of my bed was the desk with the chair behind it, facing me. At this point since I would soon feel very little from the waist down (thank goodness!) so the midwife decides to insert a catheter. That's right. I have to spread them again and allow someone else to tinker away all while this amazing specimen of man is sitting directly in front of me. If he were to look up from his paperwork his gaze would hit firmly on my vagina. I tried to sneak peeks around the midwife to see if he did look up but I didn't notice if he did. I imagine it's because he truly was not fazed by a woman's vagina being clearly visibly and in his direct line of sight. I have to accept he's seen it all before.

He soon got up and left, presumably to go and rescue another damsel in distress. I think I managed a thank you and he may have waved his acknowledgement as he left but he was otherwise completely non plussed. Two things occurred in my haze...one was imagine a story where a sexy anaesthetist falls madly in love with a woman he has just given an epidural to? That's a story to write in the future ( I never did.) The second thought was that I wanted to kiss him when the epidural kicked in and the pain stopped. I recalled an old episode of ER when a character, after being given an epidural says something along the lines of "I'm in love with the epidural man." The doctor with her says 'we call him an anaesthetist." And she replies in a honey smooth ( now pain free) voice 'To me he will always be the epidural man.' That's how I felt.

You know what occurred to me third.... Eventually. The fact that he and many other people had just seen my vagina in all its glory whilst having a catheter inserted. It was no big deal because no one made it a big deal. These people do this stuff all the time. 

So you know what. We are all normal. The people who are going to prod around down there will barely notice what your particular area looks like. Unless a part of your anatomy causes you physical pain or discomfort then there is no reason to nervously ask a doctor, or the woman who waxes you whether you are 'normal.'

So try and drop the fears about the whole naked thing. When it comes to it it really truly won't matter. Maybe one day you will even be like me and ready to strip for any doctor or practitioner without a second thought. I fear one of these days I will forget myself and strip from the waist up at the dentist... Give them all something to talk about I suppose!

I know it's hard for some as we are bought up to believe that being naked is somehow shameful. As women we don't tend to compare vaginas or labia or anything else between our legs. I'm not saying it is something we should start doing... Having vagina comparing parties... But just lose the hang ups. There are so many different kinds of normal. Most people will not care what it looks like down there so long as it's clean and functional... That goes for men too by the way...but that's a different blog post...