From the Vault of old Blogs... What's in a name?

Lazy today. Well actually not lazy but rather the muse has completly left me. I have written two blogs both of which I have rejected as utter rubbish. So I thought I would bring you something from the vault! I may well keep doing this if it proves popular (with myself anyway..) So here is a blog I wrote back in 2008 about the great game of Rugby League and the great Australian tradition of nicknames...

The Hill at Henson Park had somewhat of a reputation for being uncomfortable and crowded. Crowded, because every weekend the Newtown jets played at home, we would all head to the ground and park ourselves on the hill to watch the game. Comfort was just not a factor. Mum and Dad would sometimes bring little fold up chairs, a blue rug to cover mum's knees in the winter. Always with her was a transistor radio to listen to the commentary and her copy of the Big League so as to be able to name every player and possibly keep tab of the penalties.

My sister and I would wear Newtown beanies when it was cold and eat meat pies and sometimes run around paying football with other kids. Sometimes we would even watch the game, totally captivated, if we happened to be winning. Eventually we would get season tickets in the grandstand but the memory of the noisy crowded hill lingers.

Over the hum of the crowd Dad would occasionally throw Mum a question. 'Who is the ref?' 'Who was that bloke that just dropped the bloody ball?' 'Who just came on as a replacement?'

Mum would use her binoculars and consult her Big League to answer the questions. My questions generally went along the lines of 'Can I have an ice cream? Or 'when does the big game start?' She did not have to consult her Big League or the binoculars for those.

'So who came on as the replacement?'
'What'
'Who came on as the replacement?'
'What'
'I SAID!! - WHO CAME ON AS THE REPLACEMENT??'
'I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID!!- IT WAS WATT!!!'

I am not making this up – it actually happened. A man named Watt came on as a replacement and much hilarity ensued.

So what is in a name? Generally Rugby league players go by a nickname. I am not sure what they called the fellow Watt but most players rarely get called by the name they were christened with.

I have a greater understanding of the game these days and am as fanatical as my mother was then. The Newtown Jets are no more and neither is Balmain, the club that replaced Newtown in my affections. Now my affections lay totally with the Wests Tigers, an amalgamation of Balmain and Wests.

I watch the Footy Show on a regular basis which is hosted by guys that used to play when I was younger. They may no longer be playing but they still seem to unable to appreciate the concept of a Christian name.

The footy show host, Paul Vautin is still (affectionately) called 'Fatty' or 'The fat man'. They even use it on the promos for the show. Really – 'The footy show hosted by the great Fatty Vautin. He is joined by Sterlo, The Chief and Matty with guest appearance by The Falcon.'

Some of my favorite players ever from the great Balmain team of the late 80's must sometimes have to look at their birth certificates to remember their names. There was 'Jimmy' Jack, 'Junior' Pearce, 'Blocker' Roach.

Yes just for the record Blocker was not known for his brains but also the terms suited his build and how it felt when you ran into him…

Then there was poor Paul Sironnen who only got 'Siro'. I suppose there is something to be said for having a name that shortens easily into a nickname rather than having to come up with something appropriate to the player's personality or the like.

These days' things are bit less interesting with name shortening being the option most taken. Though Andrew Johns was (and still is, in retirement) known as 'Joey'. His brother Matthew simply got Matty. Thought thinking about it, Andy would not have suited Joey at all…

So anyway in the Tigers, Brett Hodgson gets Hoddgo, Benji Marshall gets well Benji… I have no idea if his real name is actually Benjamin but he has only ever been known as Benji, even listed in the program. Or Robbie Farah. Is he a Robert? Same goes for The Storms Billy Slater. Is he really a William? Who Knows? Check the guides – he is listed as Billy. Does he have another nickname or is Billy enough?

Then there was the great Laurie Daley. Was he ever a Lawrence? Or Willie Mason? When did he decide he would be professionally known as Willie? Not that you would ever ask lest you get your head bashed in….

On a strange note Jonathan Thurston is known as Jonathan. I have never heard him referred to as John or Johnny. Very unusual, perhaps he is one of those people that insist he be called his full name. I wonder how he got into Rugby League?

Then there is the case of those that just have a great name to start with and have no need for anything else.

Ray Warren has been commentating for years and though he said some gems over the years he is always very careful to pronounce the names of the players correctly. As the game becomes more cosmopolitan his job is being made much harder. Little wonder some of the players resort to nicknames.

The classic at the moment and I mean no offence at all to this guy, who is a great player is Fuifui Moimoi. The commentators, including Rabbits (Ray Warren – get it?) love calling it when he gets the ball. They never use a nickname, his name is great enough. Neither do they simply say his surname (Moimoi) or his Christian name (Fuifui) but rather get a buzz out of shouting out the whole thing.

'The balls goes to ground and is picked up by FUIFUI MOIMOI!!!' It sounds as though he has won the game single handed every time he gets the ball. I have no idea if he has a nickname. I can only imagine.

Also enjoyable for Rabs and his ilk are Feleti Mateo and Setaimata Sa. The great coach and now commentator Phil 'Gus' Gould once said he longs for the day Setaimata and Fuifui are playing in the same game and involved in the same play just to test Rabbits' skills.

I think having a name like Braith Anasta is pretty cool as well. Can't think what you would shorten that too.

So while they might be prevalent in Rugby League I thinking shortening names and nicknames are something of an Australian institution.

There is something very informal about Australians and for some reason many of us feel that calling someone something different to their Christian name is a sign of affection. When people call me Kell for example I know they like me. Why else would they call me that?

So while many non Australians might be thinking we are all a bit strange. The truth is if you are being called Robert or William by an Australian then chances are you either insist on being called that (and run the risk of being called something much worse), are sitting on the High Court of Australia or else they don't like you. Chances also are you don't play much Rugby League

I spent $25 on a showbag. Now you may chastise me...

I spent $25 on a show bag. Yep that’s right, I have now become one of those people that have justified the price of a show bag and so that is it, we can never go back. The prices will keep going up and up and I will not be able to complain. I am now part of the problem.

In my defence I would like to say it was for my son. It was a Thomas the Tank bag and the stuff in it was so great. I mean a little Thomas Umbrella? How could I NOT buy it? Nonetheless I did feel a sense of doing something wrong, something quite naughty once I decided to go ahead and do it!

I looked at the other bags and thought I don’t really want to get him a bag full of chocolate (I did of course buy myself a bag full of chocolate!) I told myself that the stuff in the Thomas bag was so cool and he would love it and isn’t that what a day at the show is all about? So I very shakily got my purse out and handed over the money, $31 in total for two (count em…) show bags.

My inner voice inside me was trying to get my attention whilst I was doing this to tell me how crazy it was to even think about spending that much money on a show bag. Where were my wits?  How can it be justified?

At the risk of sounding very old and annoying I want to say I remember what show bags used to cost. When I was a kid $5 was expensive for a show bag. If a parent bought you a $5 bag then you were thrilled and got to boast about it. Chances are you only got just that one bag as opposed to the other kids who got a whole heap of $2 bags. Of course those kids actually had more money spent on them overall but that was not the point. The $5 bags were prestigious, a symbol of decadence, something to salivate over and dream about.

I remember too when the $2 bags rose in price by 50 cents and how horrifying it was. My husband, bless him, remembers when show bags were actually still good old sample bags and free because they actually contained samples in them.

There were no licensed bags in my day though I do seem to recall them limping in sometime in my teens. No mostly they contained chips or chocolates and pathetic little toys. No My little Pony or Thomas or Sesame Street or anything that a small child might go nuts about. I seem to recall the odd non-food bag such as the Magic Bag which I really wanted one year but then decided against when upon closer viewing I discovered it was full of crap. Very clever of me I think to see through the marketing hype back then. Where has that person gone?

So now we have $25 bags and it would seem there is no shortage of people buying them for their kids. I got sucked in and I bet there are even some kids that get more than one of them. Imagine $50 on show bags?  Even $6 is steep really for a bag full of chocolate that probably costs less than that to buy at the supermarket. I imagine there are some people who refuse to buy them based on the crazy prices. I wish I was one of them.  I remember when my husband first expressed the thought to me; ‘Why not just go to the shop and buy some freddo’s?’  Was he kidding? Did he not see the point of THE SHOW BAG??

I am just thinking what I could do with $25 that does not involve buying one licenced bag and giving more proceeds to a company that must make a packet each year.  That is one very long list and would probably be very depressing if I wrote it down, so I won’t. I tell you what I will say, come up with a great concept for a kids TV show and have someone come on board to market the images of the cute characters on toys, toothbrushes, umbrella’s, socks, cartons of milk, ant farms etc and you will have it made.

So I am still calming down a little bit. One minute I tell myself that it is all fine. It is done now and can’t be undone and doesn’t that little backpack look just sooooo cute? At others I wonder what to make of myself. What have I become? Someone who has succumbed to hype about what is required for a good day out, someone lacking common sense and decency?

Yes folks, that is what I have become. I spent $25 on a show bag for my son and this is my confession. Now do with me what you will.